Darn – I wrote something to go with this but obviously blogging from my phone is not going to work.
Something about freedom from trying to figure it all out? Something about being a thinker/seeker and striving to attain an end point but then getting to a life stage where the saying “it’s the journey” truly resonates? Yes. That’s Right.
In my twenties I thought I was such a wise one that had triumphed a lot and was over the hardest years of my life. ha ha ha ha
In my thirties I was a new mom. Well holy crap……I was screwed…..I knew nothing really. Then entered baby two, then entered twins and I was a mother of 4 children under 5 and quite completely lost. Not lost in a bad way but children challenge and humble us. Thats how it is supposed to be. Thats us GROWING up some more. This…will happen to our children too.
As I neared 40 and made huge adult decisions about my life moving forward I was quite sure I was on my way to the deepest of knowings and huge life awareness. I was convinced of those metaphors – “jump into the net”, “walk through the fires”, “becoming a beautiful butterfly”. So I jumped, burned, became a butterfly? Hmmmmm…..maybe. How about I became a Flutter BEE? I like that better. Or perhaps one of those really cool Moths? Ok so I became a ButterflyFlutterBEEMoth. MammothMoth. Fluttering. Like a Butterfly. But buzzing like a BEE. Ok thats enough.
I am 43 now and what I have really found is a letting go. A letting go of knowing wise things. I still know nothing grande and nothing final and I know the journey will continue in its waves of knowing and not knowing.
Hence 2) What The Fuck Is This.
Maybe you know the answer.