Tangled

I am a tangled mess of everything beautiful, hopeful and yet so much doubt and fear. For some reason it feels better when I am not in hope.  But that seems wrong…..it seems wrong to stay in that safe place.

The past…trying to clear it but because we have kids the past is not the past…is it?  It is hard.

The future…I connected with an old friend and my heart went pitter…patter but I am terrible at beginnings.  I read everything wrong and I can not strike a balance between all in and all out.  I feel vulnerable and scared but then I come across as bold and beautiful…..but I am not…..I am just me and terribly tangled.

I am tangled up in my past and so close and ready to go into my future.  Will you hold my hand and walk me across? I am very good alone but I do not want to walk alone.

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6 thoughts on “Tangled”

  1. I did it once on a friends suggestion. It seemed to work for her when she and her fiancé broke up, but it really didn’t help me that much. IDK if it had anything to do with knowing the person beforehand. I wish I had an answer for you.

    Things should not be this hard.

    Like

      1. IDK, too many variables to know for sure. When i was much younger i had my fair share of ONS, and several more that really belonged to others. the rebound thing just made me feel worse.

        Liked by 1 person

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